It is still amazing to me, even after so many times, how things come into your life right when you need them the most. My mother-in-law let me borrow this little book by Mary Ellen Edmunds titled Keeping it Together in a Pull-Apart World. When I say "little", I mean it. It is only 57 pages and only 4x6 in size. It would take 30 minutes tops for me to read it. But instead of doing just that, I let it sit in my bookshelf for a few weeks. I finally pulled it out the other day when I was having somewhat of a terrible time. I came across a section that really put things into perspective for me when I was feeling a bit down. As women, particularly mothers, and as people in general, we far too often compare ourselves with people around us. Even when they aren't in competition with us, we put ourselves in competition with them. On this particular day, I was feeling like I wasn't a good enough mother, wife, housekeeper, and I wasn't doing enough reading of my scriptures, or I'm not exercising enough, or i'm not training for a marathon like every-other person I know, I'm not getting enough education or reading enough books. Everyone was doing better than me. They may not have known it, but I sure felt like it. But let me show you this excerpt from the book that made all the difference. Don't get me for plagiarism, I'm giving Mary Ellen Edmunds the credit. Here goes:
"Avoid unnecessary competition: I think there's probably a better word than unnecessary here, but what I mean is to avoid the competition that creates a pull-apart world. It's too prevalent in our lives, I think-the focus on winning (or making sure our children always win). An unrealistic need to always be first can create excessive tension, anxiety, aggression, and terrible disappointment.
"Do we too often seem to compare ourselves with and compete against everybody about everything? How stressful is that! Could we just settle down and not have to be the best and first in everything? Remember Paul's analogy (in I Corinthians 12), where he teaches that each of us who is a part of the whole is unique, and we each matter. He taught that when one member suffers, all the members suffer with it--but when one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it.
"So, even though you really felt it was what YOU wanted to do, let Vivian have her turn in the nursery, and be happy for her! Rejoice with her! We need to come closer together and eliminate that which pulls us apart. Remember: If we each gained ten pounds, we'd all be closer together!"
Sorry that this post ended up being so long, but I just wanted everyone to read that because I think that we all suffer from this in some degree. This just helped me understand that I don't need to worry about what everyone else is doing--I just need to worry about and be me! And I'm ok with that!
